Secret stories

I was on call last night in the ICU. Having a post call on Sunday can be pretty tricky at times. I chose instead to go to church, which I did not regret at all. It was a short, concise and straight to the point sermon by one of my favourite pastors. After church, I went to swim 20 laps. It felt so good. Every thing seems to fit so nicely but I find something missing.

I think I am missing someone to share these fun moments together. 

Lately, I am guilty of indulging my thoughts in creating stories and fantasies I'm my head. I suppose it is easier to imagine and pretend. Imaginations can be controlled by the mind. I can smile and laugh at all th stories that I wrote up in my mind. Not many people would think of me as creative but I think in terms of pretending and imagining, I have got to win it hands down. 

Today, reality kind of struck me. My imaginations and pretending of things that may be would never come true. I used to do plenty of these imagining when I was young. None of them came through. The nearest that came through perhaps was extending my current home and having a super cosy room of my own. That probably turned out after 20 years. But other stories remained buried and expired.

As I grow older, my stories become more and more limited. For instance, at the age of 12, I was imagining myself at age 20 living in, say, Sydney. But now that I am 28, obviously the story did not turn out to come true, hence expired. I can't possibly imagine myself at age 20 anymore. I imagine the future, not the past. So you can see how limited I have become the older I get.

I have probably stopped creating stories in my head for quite some time.. Especially when I had no time to even think during the beginning of my career life. Now, I am beginning to start creating stories again... Impossible stories.. 

My cosy room


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